Sunday, May 15, 2005

Visiting my blog, I realized that I haven't been posting for 7 days!! So I decided to kick some life into my blog before it rots/decompose... If you were wondering and pondering over why I didn't post, its because I am hitting a bad patch - things are not going too well for me and I do not want to bring the sadness into this blog which I had done previously.. Anyway, I didn't post not because I am mugging!! I am not that enthu about my studies although I have learnt that I should study hard but I am still quite slack! :P

Learnt about the difference of Prejudice and Discrimination on Friday during Language Arts.. However, I think that prejudice and discrimination bring upon the same result - pain and suffering.. Seeing the different kinds of discrimination during LA, I really feel that discrimination cause lots of pain in those who are discriminated against... But life's like that and we will face some kind of prejudice in our lives at one time or another...

Feeling sick now... Suffering from severe diarrhoea.. Went to the toilet 8 times yesterday.. Couldn't sleep last night due to a severe headache.. tossed around in bed.. Had a slight fever - about 37.9 degrees Celsius... Gastric pain acted up... Left Knee was aching... Went to the doctor today, got some medicine for my sickness... And I did something stupid... I rejected the MC that the doctor wanted to give me... (Can u believe that?) and now, my head is throbbing and my throat is feeling sore... Eyes getting tired... I can't take it anymore!!! "Zzz..."

Before I sleep, to lighten the mood (and to let me sleep better), lets read a nursery rhyme...

Sunday, May 08, 2005

On Friday, I was rather sad and depressed over some events.. However, I have thought over it and understood the problems and the solutions to them.. For the soccer problems I faced, I think that I shouldn't have just walked out of training like that... I will still continue the trainings and improve my skills - I have understood that I should seek for improvements... Although I may not be playing in the matches, I should still continue to train myself so that I can make it to the first - team when I am in year 1... Like what some of my seniors said, I should train hard and show Mr Tong what I am capable of... My Chakra is constantly increasing... *Muahahaha* *Powerful*

For my studies, I am going to work doubly hard to prove to everybody that I can do it... I will not forsake my studies for soccer anymore... I will be serious in my work and gain the respect of my fellow classmates and group members... *The attack of the "I will"s..*

I also learnt something during the message today... I learnt that wisdom is actually to respect God... and that's what I am aiming for... I will try to be as "holy" as possible.. I apologize if I have scolded any vulgarities or any four letter word.. I will also learn to manage my anger and also my time... I have forgotten all grudges and will be a person that is worth trusting - a trusted person... Understanding person in the making...

Heading towards my target... A better person, living for one purpose: For God... Doing everything for the one true God and excelling in everything... achieving my targets... becoming the best... Showing people what a real, true Christian does, resulting in them being led to Christianity too...

*Working Hard to create a new, better me!!!



Friday, May 06, 2005

Today, its the day when I am the angriest and the most hurt... During soccer, I couldn't take it anymore... During the match we played, I was playing as Right Midfielder.. It all went fine until, Mr Tong pulled me out of the match... and I had to stand there and watch... And I didn't get to play after that... That was the last straw for me... I left immediately after the match (half of training) and was awfully pissed... I have been so commited in the team and I go for every training and I still remember the time when I was late and PT had already ended, I trained myself.. I did what the other players did during PT... I was thoroughly commited, but was I ever rewarded? NO!!! I am always a substitute in the matches... The value I had in the team was the STATISTICS PROJECT!! and this project screwed my IS up... (I nearly got no grade for this important subject) did Mr Tong reward me? NO!!! It was like I SHOULD do this even when its not even beneficial to me? It's not that I am unhappy doing it... but can you give me some credit? When I do something right, I don't get praised but when I do something bad, teammates will start screaming at me... It is because that I am 15? Is it because theres discrimination against IP students? Just treat me like a Year 1... PLS... I don't want to be a benchwarmer any more.....

In group projects, I am always called the slacker... the "mountain tortoise"... but did you all think of my feelings... Its not that I am slacking... I also do my job... Must I definitely show my enthusiasm by being paranoid like Amanda? NO!!! Must I like go "I am going to fail my Maths?" Must I? Some things must be felt... not showed physically... Also, I may be slack and crappy in group discussions but that doesn't mean that you can disregard my opinions forever!!! My opinions may work you know? Pls understand me... Pls...

I really can't take it anymore... No jokes today... You may see me laughing all the time, cheerful and happy but inside, do you know how I feel... I really need to release all the unhappiness in my heart... that's why I am writing this blog now... Awfully pissed (20%) and hurt (100%)... If you were to see me now, my eyes would be red and with tears all over my face... Pls help me God.... I really can't take it anymore...

*I am going to be serious... and I terribly hate discrimination... Don't always think that what you see is what is happening in reality... You know something? I am crying in a tiny corner of my room now...



Thursday, May 05, 2005

Today, didn't do much.. but as usual, lots of interesting stuff happened... The interesting part of today was during IS (TCM) It looked like a nice time for me to slack, we watched a video for 30 minutes before we were supposed to be dismissed.. Then, there was a twist and I had to stay back to do an experiment on Red Bull.. It was part of the school's shooting the IP life in TJ and we had to "model" and pretend to be hard at work.. acting like little geniuses... Everything turned out fine.. until the teacher asked me to be the model in front of the camera because, according to her, I was very "handsome" which was rather -_-''' and I had to have a curious look observing the apparatus in front of the cam... *smacks head*

Quite an interesting experience and my friend, wearing the professor jacket and "modelling" was said to look more like an "Ah Beng" *lol*

Not going to slack ever again... My Chakra has improved and is slowly going to explode...
Forgot 1 last thing... The important announcement...

This is an important news: Penguin Rocks.... *wait a minute, that's not the end of the announcement* Penguin Rocks were found on a local beach.. Anybody who happened to pick them, please call the "Sean Modelling Museum hotline" because they are rather rare and we would like to exhibit them in our museum... Thank you...

*joking... PENGUIN ROX!!!



Wednesday, May 04, 2005

I felt the gush of "pissfulness" when I got back the Language Arts marks.. I got the lowest of the group... and my essay was like just passed.. then, bad things continued to happen... one of the keys of the keyboard of my tablet came out and I was going "xianz.." Training was rather boring.. It was e photo session and we had to pose and take pictures and also other "action shots" It was sooo lame... then everybody went like super excited... quite fun really...



Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Posting something now... Yesterday, I was hysteric... I went "blind"... I couldn't see the Naruto pictures.. They escaped from my blog..

Okay.. enough of nonsense.. Feel that I have a talent inside me... why? because I understood the Maths thingy faster than Junping *tweeze..* oops.. I really should join the ego club cause i am getting more egoistic...

Question of the day: How to gain a person's trust?

*can anyone answer me..



Sunday, May 01, 2005

Yipee! Got my first blog... Isn't it cool... "Pardon my excitment.. (First-time will surely be excited right?)" I was so blur and confused about making this blog that I have to ask around.. Thanks to all those who taught me some stuff.. Otherwise, I will still be struggling..

Anyway, tests and projects deadlines are coming.. Stress is also approaching.. I am not trying to be pessimist but this is inevitable.. Everybody must be mugging now right? And I am still slacking, trying to force myself to do work.. (as usual) "oops.."Good luck to everybody for the tests.. "Jia You" * waves fist frantically in the air*

By the way, what are the tests we are having next week? I forgot... Oops...